Va’etchanan
Deuteronomy 3:23–7:11

Jen Smith – Guest Torah Blogger

The Rambam (Maimonides, 1138-1204) explained that prayer is talking to God every day. The Hebrew word for prayer is Tefillah, is a reflexive verb that means to “judge oneself.” It is not just about reading or singing the words to which we may or may not feel connected. Instead, prayer is an opportunity for honest introspection, finding ways to improve so that we can be the kind of people that we want to be (and God wants us to be).

I recently found myself having a difficult conversation with my kid about back-to-school shopping, designer labels, and the enduring quest for Cool, when I thought: I wonder if this is how God feels. Is this analogous to how God loves each of us like a parent loves their only child, always giving us more than we “need” or deserve; nevertheless, finding Himself listening to our tearful pleads for extra stuff. How did God “feel” listening to His beloved Moses ask God to reverse His decision? Did God struggle with this decision?  And this doesn’t even touch on the gratitude that should come after receiving such blessings! (Regardless of the designer label.)

This week’s Torah portion, Va’etchanan, means “and he pleaded,” referring to Moses asking God to enter the Promised Land. Our Sages explain that Moses, despite his myriad good deeds, asked God for this as a “gift” rather than making his case based on his merits or “what he deserved.” Our great rabbis believed that this provided insight into the proper application of prayer:  we should pray with humility, asking God for kindness rather than assuming we deserve it.  The Midrash (a collection of teachings) similarly says that even Moses, who was closer to God than any other man, approached God with humility, first recognizing and acknowledging that no human can demand anything from God.

Our rabbis also believed that true humility requires us not only to ask God with kindness, but to also feel genuinely unworthy of His blessing, embodying the truth that regardless of how virtuous our actions may be, we can always do more, recognizing that God’s blessings are, therefore, “undeserved.” I have always struggled with the notion that the story of the Jewish people in the Torah should inspire us to feel genuinely unworthy of His divine blessings.  From the very beginning, God made us in His divine image, he led us out of slavery in Egypt, comforted and sustained us in the wilderness, finally delivering us to Promised land. God did all of this for our ancestors since the beginning of time – how could I feel unworthy when all I feel is Loved? God’s actions prove that we are worthy. Our job on earth is to work faithfully to live an honest, value-driven life, always reaching to fulfill our spiritual and personal potentials.  Moses, described as the humblest man on earth, exemplified this approach. He knew his virtues came from God and believed that if someone else had received those gifts, they might have achieved even more.

Moses’ request for a “free gift” reflects his understanding that reaching the highest levels of Divine revelation – those connections that are beyond the human capacity alone – they require grace. However, God’s response emphasizes that even though we are ultimately “unworthy” in the sense of being mere mortals, that our efforts at fulfilling mitzvot, acts of loving kindness, and adherence to Torah still matter. The process of striving to reach toward living a Godly life is everything because it helps prepare us to receive Divine blessings. Even when those blessings come as a gift, they are only meaningful when they are grounded in our own sense of spiritual work.

In essence, the paradox is that while we acknowledge our unworthiness, our service and efforts are still necessary. They prepare us to receive and appreciate the divine gifts that, in the end, transcend our efforts. God is guiding us on a path that may not always make sense to us, but we trust that living our Jewish values is our North Star. This Shabbat, as many of us return to work and school, may we all meet the challenges ahead with gusto knowing that God is giving us an opportunity to become his partner in creation – creating a dwelling place for God in our community, in our homes, and within our heart.

Shabbat Shalom!