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How Beth Ami senior staff members think
(Chapter 1: Adult B’nai Mitzvah)

Dear Beth Ami Friends,

Every week, our senior professional team (Rabbi Weiss, Cantor Eschler, Kim Roberts, Paula Sayag, Janice Rosenblatt and myself) get together to talk about, well, all things Beth Ami. We look at upcoming holidays and programs (and those that have just passed), community engagement, the Jewish values we want to bring to each event or initiative we are supporting, and generally at how we can add value to your Beth Ami experience.

Usually, before something comes to the full senior staff, we work singly or in small groups on a concept. When it’s ready (being only half-baked) we bring it to the table for further discussion. The conversation often takes surprising twists and turns before we arrive at our final decision.

For example, every few years we offer an adult b’nei mitzvah process for those who were not able to become b’nei mitzvah when they were kids.

It should be simple, right? After all, we’ve done this before, just offer a class, pick a date and go.

Let me share with you a little story about the Talmud, or rather, Talmudic logic. A teacher describes a certain event to a student. It is late at night, and dark outside. Two thieves sneak into a house by crawling down the chimney, and when they are both in – one of them suddenly decides to wash his face. The teacher asks which one washes, the one who came down first or the one who followed?

Which do you think? Why?

The student thinks about it and says it was the first one, because he would be dirtier having gone down first.

The teacher compliments the student’s excellent reasoning skill, but the student is wrong – it is the other thief! The student thinks about it, and finally realizes what he had missed – that the second thief would have immediately seen how dirty the first thief was and then assumed that he too was dirty – so the second thief would wash. Excellent logic, right? Again, the teacher would complement the student, before informing him that this answer, too, is wrong. It is the first thief after all. So, the student thinks some more and realizes that any house worth robbing would have mirrors inside, and when the first thief saw himself in the mirror he would realize that he was dirty and wash. As you might have guessed by now, the teacher is just getting started, and it doesn’t really matter which thief it was. Rather, the exercise is about how to keep on looking for more angles to understand whatever we are studying.

THIS is how our senior team thinks!

Adult B’nei mitzvah is simple?

WRONG!

First, we need to consider what specific information our students would need for a meaningful and successful experience. This part is straightforward: they will need an Introduction to Judaism class to enrich and challenge their current knowledge of our tradition; they also will need to learn Hebrew and about how the prayer book is organized; and they will need time to prepare for a special service in which they become b’nei mitzvah together by chanting from the Torah.

Great! So, we sit down and schedule out a year of classes: 10 sessions of Introduction to Judaism taught by Rabbi Weiss and myself; 3 consecutive 5-session courses on Hebrew taught by Cantor Eschler, each one advancing the level of proficiency so that every student will feel confident; and several sessions for service prep. We looked carefully at the religious school calendar so that we could be present both for our adult students and our kids and we figured out an entire year’s program.

Yet how do we maximize the meaning and spiritual power of this process? We are still working on that, but, for starters, why not schedule the service to coincide with the Festival of Shavuot – the holiday in which we commemorate the giving of the Torah at Mount Sinai? In the morning service we celebrate Torah with our confirmation class. Why not make the evening service special by celebrating our adult b’nei mitzvah?

Great, done, we are ready to go. Right?

Well …

What should we charge? This is after all a massive investment of resources. And what if we opened parts of the process to everyone? After all, the Introduction to Judaism class is also helpful for conversion students, interfaith couples considering a Jewish marriage, and anyone who is interested in learning more on an adult level. Plus, we regularly get requests for adult Hebrew classes. Wouldn’t it be great if we opened them up to the congregation?

Ok. So, we are going to make the Intro class and the Hebrew available to everyone. How do we explain which parts are just for adult b’nei mitzvah and which parts are for everyone?

Why, with a very complicated flyer of course!

“You are absolutely right,” says the teacher, “But that is not the answer!”

Don’t worry. We will have complicated flyers for you to read. However, we also thought it would be a good idea to share some information here in this article. Which is to say, we are happy to announce that we are offering an adult b’nei mitzvah class, which will start in September and culminate on Erev Shavuot, Saturday evening, June 8. The adult b’nei mitzvah fee will be $300 and will cover everything except for books. If you are interested, please let one of the clergy team know by September 1. We are also happy to announce that we are making the Introduction to Judaism Class (taught on Sunday mornings) and the Hebrew classes (Tuesday evenings) open to the entire congregation for a low fee. We hope that you will join us in learning and celebration. Please look for future announcements with more details, and in the meantime, we hope that you enjoy a relaxing and uncomplicated summer.

Warmly,

RGP

Hi, I’m Buzz Karpay, your new Temple President. My wife, Lynn, and I are long-time members of Temple Beth Ami and, if you have been at the Temple with some frequency, there is a good chance you have seen me even if we don’t know each other yet. If that’s the case, I hope that the next time we see each other in the building, we both have a few minutes to say hello and introduce ourselves to each other.

Each year Temple Beth Ami has a service recognizing our graduating high school seniors. The students have a chance to share their thoughts during the service about why they stayed in our Machane (Religious School) program all the way through high school. As I have listened to these students over the past few years, I realized that there is a common thread. Almost every single graduating senior mentions the community as a significant factor in their choosing to remain in TBA High. They have built and nurtured friendships from the time they entered school. That makes me proud of Temple Beth Ami.

Our adult members are attracted to Temple Beth Ami for reasons that are similar to those of our graduating high school students. Community has been a common theme during our Vision 2020 strategic planning effort, expressed through comments we have received from hundreds of congregants over the past few months. While there have certainly been comments about other aspects of Beth Ami, it is quite clear from the feedback that the warm, caring, inclusive community is one of the strongest bonds that our members feel. That should make us all proud of Temple Beth Ami.

When Lynn and I joined nearly 40 years ago, I didn’t realize that Temple Beth Ami would be so much more than a place to pray and study. The congregation was only about 250 families then, and we both quickly became active in Temple activities and on the Board. It wasn’t long before it felt like we knew nearly everyone in the congregation, and we started celebrating with our new community. We have celebrated the births of our children, b’not mitzvah, confirmations, high school and college graduations, weddings, and now the births of our grandchildren. We have also found support from you during difficult and challenging times. We still come here to pray and study. But even praying and studying are enriched by our being surrounded by what is now our extended family – all of you.

There has never been a better time for you to become more involved – or more involved – in Beth Ami’s activities. Our Vision 2020 strategic planning initiative has already involved hundreds of you through house meetings and other information-gathering forums. We currently have research teams taking the information you provided, combining that with other sources, and preparing to present the results of their research. These results will be made available to the entire congregation as they become available and will be thoroughly discussed at Board meetings before any action is taken. I want to remind you that Board meetings are open to the congregation and I encourage you to attend our September, October and/or November meetings at which the research will be discussed. Specific topics for discussion at each meeting will be sent out in advance. Please come, join in the discussions, and make your voice heard.

I hope that during my term as President I can meet those of you whom I do not know and encourage you to become more involved. I would like you to feel the same sense of attachment, pride, and satisfaction that I have for our sacred community. Through increased involvement in the Temple, I believe you will increase your joy and satisfaction.

Like me, your Board is here to serve the Congregation. If you ever have questions, concerns, or feedback of any kind, you should always feel free to contact me. I look forward to working with the Board and with you over these next two years. I thank you for putting your trust in me.